I’m working my way through an incredibly illuminating book by Danielle La Porte, The Desire Map and have arrived at the bit when I have to choose my core desired feelings. These feelings are the result of honing down, in the main 5 areas of your life, the feelings you wish to feel. The absolute heart of the matter. It’s a process and one part of the process is to look up the dictionary definitions for the words you have on your long list as you work towards your short list and eventually down to 3-5 core desired feelings. Amazing what looking up the definitions of words brings up and I feel generally that I am a little sloppy in my vocabulary use when I read exactly what some words I commonly use mean. English is such an eloquent, rich language that I feel I may have reduced myself to using such a small fraction of whats available to me and even then perhaps not hitting the nail exactly on the head in terms of actual meaning.

I think in the frenetic world we live in we can perhaps easily fall into a vague definition of living. A life which can slip by without perhaps being as vital or as technicolor as one would have wanted.

This week brings with it a significant birthday for me so age and time is on my mind. As I soar into a brand sparkling new decade my hope is to live a big, wild, colorful, creative and lovely life. A life my childhood self would have wanted for me. Somehow in the past decade fears and doubts have tripped me up and depleted me of my vibrancy so ironically after having spent most of the past 12 months dreading the big birthday thats coming, I now find myself skipping with glee towards it, towards a new beginning, a new decade with a new script. Where words like radiant, vibrant, expansive and harmonious will rule and the colors I’ll paint in will be bold and dazzling. Hold onto your bright, wild hat darling.

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  • Ned Buratovich September 19, 2016 Reply

    Happy Birthday, Mhairi!

    Desire, precisely.

    • Mhairi September 25, 2016 Reply

      Thank you so much darling!

  • Ned Buratovich September 19, 2016 Reply

    DESIRE (by Alice Walker)

    My desire
    is always the same; wherever Life
    deposits me:
    I want to stick my toe
    & soon my whole body
    into the water.
    I want to shake out a fat broom
    & sweep dried leaves
    bruised blossoms
    dead insects
    & dust.
    I want to grow
    It seems impossible that desire
    can sometimes transform into devotion;
    but this has happened.
    And that is how I’ve survived:
    how the hole
    I carefully tended
    in the garden of my heart
    grew a heart
    to fill it.

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