This week I severely put to test my ability to be gracious and in fact probably failed in my attempt. I answered the phone to a number I didn’t know for sure but who I had a seriously strong inclination was a sales call. It turned out to be a very chirpy voice banging on immediately about whether or not I still needed one of my websites to be hosted, as if not I should delete it immediately or I would be charged for it all in a matter of weeks. Time was of the essence etc etc. Time is always of the essence and with me this week I have been juggling rehearsals for my cabaret, youtube academy, press releases and shoe thinking of next weeks red carpet events and whatnot. All that to say it was with sinking feeling that I stopped what I was doing to first of all find my passwords to even get into this site in order to take off said website thereby saving me money. As the daughter of a Scottish father whenever anyone mentions saving money I am obliged to follow instructions straight away.
So there we went, deep into technical worlds of which I know nothing about nor do I ever really want to. Anyway we deleted said now redundant website and he went on chatting about various other products. Suddenly I puzzled that the other two active websites weren’t listed under my products. When I questioned this, there was sudden silence on the other end of the phone. Then a question I never want to hear again: “do you have access to the files?” I stared at the empty chair next to my desk where Katie the photographer usually sits but who is currently in Australia and who would be the only person who would be able to answer that question. I stood up and felt pale. I sat down and stared at my 19000 beads but could not find grace in my response to be honest. Months of work leading to the website, the press releases that were going out that day with links to the website, the festivals coming up next week, the cabaret the week after….
I googled my website Feathers and Toast immediately found a crashed site, nothing of our bathtub and champagne poster, not a glimmer of our behind the scenes shots and videos. Nada. Bleak. A garish statement declaring that the domain had been purchased but that there was currently no website.
The now desperate sounding voice at the other end of the phone said he needed to put me on hold. Blasting out muzak now filled my room and provided a maddening soundtrack to my ever mounting panic. Finally he came back on saying normally they would charge me for restoring my files but as it was technically his fault (my fault to be honest being simply having answered the phone now 25 minutes ago) He kept saying sorry. I kept repeating how inconvenient it all was. He kept asking questions about my show. I kept being short and stressed and kept willing myself to be gracious. As if the jar of pearls facing me was chiding me into finding a meagre ounce of grace somewhere in myself. I’m ashamed to say to be totally honest, although at the end of the 1hr 45 min call when things were on their way to being restored I was able to breathe again more evenly, attaining grace with the man was a little beyond me.
So basically what I am saying is that one can only hope that being pushed to the brink facing website collapse will be deemed as a extraneous circumstances if ever I am evaluated in the grace dept. May this week have been a wonderfully more relaxing one for all of you and may you never have to answer the question “do you have the files”Tags: crash, grace, Mhairi Morrison, The bead movement, website