Some periods of life are not easy. They call for deep inner work and emotional heavy lifting. This might mean you have to accept what feels unacceptable, or forgive what feels like the unforgivable. It might mean taking a painful look at yourself, or being open to change in areas where you can’t imagine yourself changing. Spiritual comfort doesn’t derive from simply throwing a little white light around an issue. It’s not like you grasp a spiritual principle or two and voilà, your pain is gone. Rather, you start learning and applying the principles and voilà, you’re on your way.
Spiritual work is not an easy way to cope, like somethings we grab on to as a substitute for serious psychological remedy. It is a walk through what can be a very deep, dark psychic jungle, knowing that monsters lurk among the trees but with the hero’s dedication to conquering them. Spirituality isn’t the purview of the weak; it’s the purview of the brave. – Marianne Williamson from ‘Tears to Triumph’
Several situations this week lead me to share this extract from Marianne Williamson’s latest book ‘Tears to Triumph’. First, the very fact that I think we need to recognize that it often takes a lot of tears before we can triumph. And second, a common “misperception” of me is that since I’m often very happy and joyous, people who don’t know me that well tend to think that “That girl doesn’t know a thing about darkness, hurt, or loss.” But people who know me very well, know deep in their hearts, that I very much so know darkness, loss and deep excruciating pain. It’s just that I have spent the last 15 years (and especially the last 4 years) of my life doing the heavy lifting Marianne Williamson speaks of. And that is what I want to talk a bit about.
There was a time when I felt limited and restrained by the traumas of my life. But defining myself through the traumas also made me know who I was. I let the traumas and the pain define me, and in that I found a sense of security, and something to hold on to. But deep within me I could feel that this false sense of comfort was eating away on my soul’s core. I was in fact limiting myself, letting myself play small, and it was making me sicker for every day passing.
So I had to break away. I had to go diving deep into my soul, and do this heavy lifting in order to become a truer version of who I am. Because that is how I look at spirituality, and personal growth. To unlearn the negative behaviors that hinders the unhurt part of our soul from shining. I’m nowhere near a finish line, but the fact that I on most days see myself as happy is a clear testament to what this spiritual heavy lifting has given me. Of course I have bad times, but I get through them a lot easier. Not a week passes by without me feeling a strong sense of gratitude of how far I have come. Even though it’s a personal journey (and I need to take it on my own) I have sought out many people, healers, and leaders for knowledge and to guide me – in person, through books, seminars and sessions. And just as Marianne Williamson writes – it’s not comfortable, it’s not easy, and it will hurt. But it’s a path of light, and that’s what I want to bring into the world. That it is possible to not let your past define you, but instead accept it as a part of your journey, so you can become the true authentic you.Tags: authentic, Johanna Ginstmark, Marianne Williamson, spirituality, The bead movement